Thought process

I think that the more you think of something the more you start to think of it everyday. And that in turn forces you to contemplate on the future regardless of whatever happens in the present or has had happened in the past. Yes i do fall in this category and i do think a lot. But what matters is not the fact that i think but 'what' i think. Its quite a shame that i complain of concentration problems and my classmates call me absent-minded. Cant blame them, can i? After all we want to mix with those who reciprocate the attention we give to them. Where then will people like me fit in? The answer lies not in me nor in you nor in the others. It lies in what we share ie., friendship and mutual understanding.

We proudly proclaim our dedication to our large contingent of friends to the extent of even dedicating status updates to them. Hell with the updates! What about friendship day, bands, cards! Its all a reiteration of what we have always believed; the belief strengthened and motivated by friendship itself. Yes we do believe in friendship but does that mean we believe our friends? Does that mean that whatever happens in coming times we will always be there for our friends? Is that so? Is that what friendship is all about? Beliefs? If that be the case then answer me one question. What will you do when that belief is proved wrong? Will you cow down in shame? Will you fret in anger? Will you take vengeance by shattering the ‘beliefs’ of others too? Or will you move forward and hug life with absolute innocence and decide to delete that particular chapter from your life? Or will you proclaim a different tone now- saying you have lost trust in friendship? Whatever you do, one thing is certain- your belief sets its departure from your changed mind. Its poisonous now. Not conducive to innocent ‘beliefs’. And that’s when you change. Oh the pain of it! You pray that you get out of this shit and eventually it takes such a toll on you that you give up and you allow the veil to cover you, block you from contentment and true happiness. You realize that you are different from before. Thus starts the true transformation- from a believer to a realist. And in turn starts the mental questionnaires! What else do you expect from a realist? A realist always asks questions; since the world is always short of answers. And the world is what the petty realist turns to since his ‘beliefs’ have deserted him.

Yes i can relate myself to the above. And what else can i do? I don’t have the script of my life nor do i have any access to God till i die so that i could ask him all my questions! But i guess thats out of the question for now; so here i am asking questions to this deaf world. Deaf it is and deaf it will remain. But deep down in my kind heart i do pray that my friends too remain, with me. The transformation may have taken place already but as they say, ‘nothing is perfect’, i hope this transformation is not perfect and deep down inside i do come to ‘believe’ that i do need friends and they do not deserve to see the change in me. I will try my level best. Rest is in their hands.

Perfection is always good but sometimes imperfection is better!

And what better example than LIFE itself.